As look back over the past couple months, I have gradually seen a real heart change. I can't tell you how much that means to me! Sure, we have celebrated some behavior changes over the last year or so, but a 'heart change' that means so much more to me than behavior modification...it means a lot to Jesus too. When we have had to talk to you or discipline you about poor choices you have made, we have also prayed with you and asked you to pray as well that God would help you love others and treat them with kindness. We have also been praying that you would have a heart that desires to obey us, because your obedience to us is also obedience to Jesus.
A couple weeks ago we were driving in the grocery store parking lot and you saw a woman walking in front of my van. You said, "Watch out for her mom" and I told you that I was and you didn't have to worry and you responded with, "I wanted to make sure because I care about her mom". That made my heart happy!
When we have friends over or go to visit friends, I'm actually excited for you. I admit I still get nervous sometimes,(hopefully someday that automatic response will go away)but in reality, you have grown in the area of friendship as well. It's still hard at times, but I see you choosing to give a toy to a friend that wanted it, or loving a friend that got hurt and I'm thankful. You're still 4 and sometimes it's harder for you than others, but I've seen growth and it makes me so proud.
I watch you with baby Elle (the baby we are watching for a couple months until her daycare is available) and I see how gentle you are and how you love to talk to her and sing to her and make her smile...it's precious. The way you have become best friends with your sister and playing every day after school, I love it, you are making memories and building a great relationship. Lately, you have also really enjoyed complementing people. Yesterday you randomly said, "mom, your necklace is very pretty", or you'll say:
- "mom, I think you're really pretty, you're the best mom, I really love you" (pouring out love)
- "Josiah, you're the best big brother"
- "Alayna, I love you"
- "dad, you're the BEST dad"
Honestly, my heart smiles every time I hear you talk like that.
Now before you think that you're perfect...you aren't...you're still sinful and struggle at times (you always will), but seeing the way you are growing and the way God is changing your heart is precious and I never want to forget it. I love you so much my sweet, sweet youngest and I'm so thankful the Lord chose to bless us with you. Watching you grow and seeing your heart change has been a true blessing!